> THE PS1 LEGEND IS BACK...
> AND IT'S IN YOUR BROWSER!
> SHREK. VODKA. DAD. LOVE.
GAME IS STILL IN THE OVEN
(DEV IS DRINKING).
DROP YOUR EMAIL TO BE THE FIRST TO KNOW!
* We won't sell your email (unless someone offers a good price).
This game was supposed to release in 1998 on the first PlayStation, but Hideo Kojima personally came to the office and said:
"Are you all out of your f***ing minds?"
The project was shut down. Archives were burned. But we found the source code during another PSN leak!
This isn't just a visual novel. It's a life simulator where you can become Shrek, seduce a schoolboy's mom, and drink vodka with dad (not the one who left for cigarettes, a different one), without getting up from your chair!
> Initializing Soap Engine 1.0...
> Loading dumpling textures... [OK]
> Loading model "Dad_In_Undershirt.obj"... [WARNING: POLYGONS TOO LOW]
> Connecting to the astral plane...
> ERROR: Too much cringe in sector 7G
> Ignoring common sense...
> Starting simulation...
Your decisions don't affect anything (we mean your real life), but in our game you get 5 endings!
Soap that doesn't sting your eyes, but stings your soul. PS1-level graphics that even a toaster can run.
Can you avoid getting slapped by Dad or find happiness with Mrs. Johnson?
Package includes the game disc (scratches included), a HUGE "MOM" sticker (huge, but not full-size because we'd need a shipping container), and the smell of stale beer. Enjoy the aesthetic of plastic, like the good old days.
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